By Adam Welsch
Naomi & Nicole®
More than 100 million Americans (and countless others from around the world) tuned in Sunday night to watch the Green Bay Packers defeat the Pittsburgh Steelers in Super Bowl XLV. As everyone knows, the Super Bowl is the world’s premier American football event. But how many people know it’s also a global stage for the presentation of the latest in women’s intimate apparel? No, I’m not talking about the costumes donned by the dancers during the halftime show (electrifying as they were). Nor am I referring to the outfits worn by the Steelers’ or Packers’ cheerleaders (since neither team even has a cheerleading squad). Rather, I’m talking about what more than a few of the female Wisconsin faithful in attendance were sporting: cheese bras.
From the pictures above you can see that this little yellow number is strapless. It’s interesting that the maker chose not to include spaghetti straps or, as one might think, straps made from string cheese. You can also tell that it’s made out of foam, not real Swiss. Pity that. Though French Brie would be far too soft to use as its “fabric,” inventive Wisconsinites might next year turn to Bra, an Italian cheese made in the northern province of Cuneo, that can be served hard if allowed to age for at least six months.
Given that cheese bras will now be turning up at future Green Bay Packer games, it’s only logical to ask whether any other culinary C-cups are available for fans of other football teams. Though no other styles appear ready for supporters of the other thirty-one NFL teams, our crack research staff here at In Form® has turned up the following possibilities for the boosters of several college football programs.
In no particular order:
It’s too bad that Janet Jackson didn’t own a cheese bra in 2004. The wardrobe malfunction caused by her encounter with Justin Timberlake would have inspired detailed discussions of cheddar, rather than a firestorm of critical chatter, in the wake of the halftime show of Super Bowl XXXVIII.